It Takes a Village

Jags 147/5 (Parrish 80*, Ant 20, Turner 2-3, Taylor 1-25) beat Histon 109/6 (Mailes 25, Turner 22, Brett 1-12, Bennett 1-15) by 38 Runs

MOTM - Matt Parrish (duh, look at the scorecard!)

To all regular readers of this blog, I do apologise. I've been a bit neglectful in match reports these last few games, partially as I have a new job, a child and some other things keeping me rather busy. Partially it is also an abundance of laziness. I will endeavour to improve.

We have a strong affinity with Histon, seeing as half our number play for them at the weekend and some occasionally turn up for them when they're absolutely and utterly desperate and bereft of other options (cough), so we do enjoy games against them. Nothing, to my mind says "spirit of cricket" like playing a game with and against your friends, exchanging lots of lovely banter, and then getting to the pub afterwards for beers. Together. As it should always be. 

This game was re-arranged from a few weeks earlier owing to weather and it was sure to be dark at the death. Histon have invested in many things, but all round lights are not one of the fine facilities they have, so the side that bats first had a distinct advantage. The toss was key. 

How we'd like it to look of an evening - that's Matt and Ant by the way

So Matt got mega super amazing Captain points for winning the toss, and whilst there are differing schools of thought on this (there actually aren't; you bat first in evening cricket) he decided batting first was the thing. Even then, with the clouds as they were, it was not light. It had been much nicer two weeks prior when the game had been called off because there was the prospect of some rain, maybe, in another village somewhere else. Still good to get this one on. The groundsman also put us on the 1st pitch (yay) but right on the edge of the square (booh) on a strip that was green as George Ezra's lawn, and angled at a tilt that looked like it was the first hill located in all of Cambridge (WTAF).

This is roughly what the track looked like, at least it must have been given how I batted

Matt and Ant, our star opening men strolled out facing an assortment of Histon 1st and 2nd teamers, all familiar to them, and proceeded to hit with free abandon right from the off. 21 runs were plundered in the first eight ball over, with Ant absolutely murdering a 6 on the 2nd or 3rd ball that meant the ball had to be replaced within the first over. The assembled gang of girlfriends, children, brothers and fathers, and at least one mum had to wait a good 5 minutes before play resumed. Then Ant and Matt took back to where they had started, Ant in particular was in no mood to wait around. Matt was in there too, belting a 4 through square, and forcing Ant to jog through for the odd single. He's determined to help Ant stay fit.

Ant was clearly riled up for this, as he was giving no one any respect, off side, on side, he even moved his cement block feet a couple of times to hammer the ball this way and that. I want to say Histon looked stunned, but it was already too dark and I couldn't see their faces. After some fairly lovely biffing, I recall a lofted cover drive for 4, a crunched backward square swivel and one straight back over the bowler for a one bounce 4, we were flying at 41 without loss from 3 overs. This forced Histon skipper and 1st team regular Turner to come on and bowl to arrest the rate. Ant was hitting the ball with the ferocity of Simba from the Lion King when he's all big and stuff and has just found out his uncle killed his dad. Awkward.

Live by the sword, die by the sword, as Ant fell to the first worldy of a catch that evening, spanking a certain four over extra cover that was caught, it must be said somewhat painfully, by one of the Taylor's on the team. Benjamin Sawyer then strolled out, his Mum watching expectantly. Matt gave him a long talking to before he took guard, the words were probably, "he's a good bowler, just play it safe and get in". Sawyer nodded purposefully and then took a wild swipe at the first ball and was bowled leg stump. He walked back, his Mum shook her head, and she left the ground.

This left me walking in, on a green strip, against a 1st team bowler on a hat trick with the whole field in. Brilliant. Matt basically said the same things to me that he had said to Sawyer. I was just sat there hoping he didn't bowl it near the stumps or me. He didn't, wide of off, and I even got a "good leave" from the keeper, which felt a bit odd to me, as I actually tried to hit it, but am so old and slow it looks like a leave nowadays. We then settled into a phase of the game that I'm going to call the "one man army" section, where I couldn't score for toffee, Matt was hitting the ball to all corners, and the game was really, keep Mark off strike and don't run Matt out. I took my non scoring partner role very seriously for the 20 balls it took me to get my 3 runs before being bowled finally trying to actually spank one.

Matt was absolutely belting it, despite some very good bowling, and favoured the offside, back over the bowlers head, deep square, cow corner, and probably some other places too. Fraser bowled very well at this stage, economic, and making full use of the absolutely ridiculous track that we had been given. Phillips joined Parrish, and Matt at this stage must have thought, what sins have I committed in a previous life to get absolutely no support from batsmen 3, 4, or 5, as Phillips missed a lot, much as I had, before falling to the aforesaid Christie, trapped LBW. Well done that man and good luck for your A-level results this week.

 

Matt and his army...

Cozzie, a late subsitute to the action joined, and initially was taking the same line as Sawyer, Fardell and Phillips had. Missing a lot, surviving a ridiculous ball that almost shaved leg stump, but crucially running ably with Matt, helping Matt farm strike, and not running Matt out. Matt got to his 50 here off about 30 balls, and seemed to be playing a different sport to everyone else. Cozzie, clearly encouraged then hit the shot of this, or indeed any night, moving his feet across, stretching the long levers, and absolutely nailing a driven 6 that flew over extra cover on the full, drawing universal approval from the Histon team. Matt was still motoring, looking knackered, and forcing copious changes to the field that didn't really achieve anything other than more runs. Cozzie fell eventually on 10, caught, leaving poor Mr Barker to stroll in with 3 balls to come.

He got a 2 and 2 and 1 to finish, and didn't run Matt out either. 147-5 felt both par, and actually pretty awesome given that it was essentially all down to Matt. Seeing the strength of the opposition, and knowing they are operators, we knew we'd need to be at our absolute best. And we were.

Chris Mailies (part time Jag) and Ben Keeble went out for the opposition first. It got a touch darker as Mr Bennett opened the bowling, as he does. Honest to goodness he was great at the open, looking angrier than ever, and making it hard for Chris to score. Ant misfielded slightly, but in truth, it was inconsequential even at this early stage, since the batsman rushed a single to the misfield just to get off strike. I think Bennett had them both rattled right from the off.

He was joined in partnership by Mr Brett, who whilst not angry, bowled like he was mildly irked by some small crime against cricket somewhere, conceding few off his opening over, forcing some play and missed opportunities, and generally being the wily pro that he is with ball in hand. Chris in particular was seeing a lot of the strike, but not getting any of it off the square. It was a top 2 overs to start, well supported with Phillips behind the stumps doing a great job right away, Sawyer in aggressive form in the field (now his Mum had gone, he could let it all go). 3rd over in, the first strike, low scoring rate and Keeble tried to go aerial and pitched it to Parrish at mid off to take calmly over his head. This brought the dangerman, Stuart Cronin to the crease. He is well known for hitting the ball into space on a fairly regular basis. In fact, I reckon about 2% of all space debris is cricket balls hit by Stu. I can't prove it: you can't disprove it; it's a Schrodinger's fact (sort of).

Bennett continued and was denied an LBW on Chris. The umpire gave it, but after consultation with the sporting, amiable and gentlemanly fellow that Adam Phillips is, we all agreed he'd hit it and he stayed in. Fielding at this point was top notch, Cozzie stopped a cracker in the deep, Tyler held up a certain boundary, and there were almost run outs galore a couple of times. Boud was having a fair old time of it on the boundary was well. It was like most of the team had eaten Reddie Brek washed down with Red Bull in the morning. It was an exciting time for me to be stood at square leg, doing nothing but watch it all unfold.

Scoring was slow, light was drawing in, and then the moment of this or any night happend. Stu had scored a couple of 2's and went big to Liam's bowling. He absolutely leathered the ball back at Liam, for the nano second I saw it, I expected it to kill Liam, or go straight through him and soar to the boundary. It didn't neither, he deflected it, quick thinking in his follow through with his right hand deflecting the ball, and it finally settled in his left. It had been absolutely monstered, and he had held it like a regular Sunday afternoon game of catch with the kids in the garden. Stu was incredulous, talking about quitting cricket, and most people had no idea what had actually happened, it was that fast. Players hugged, children cried, spectators whooped, and it was all a bit mad to be honest. 

Freddie Meldal joined the game, having opted to play for Histon. He's a welcome sight, and has had a lovely weekend season. Still, a game is a game, and he was greeted to the crease with the customary jokes. He managed to score a 4 edged past Phillips. He also left one that was a gnat's hair wide of off stump, eliciting a very vocal reaction.

Liam had to stop bowling at this point, as his right hand was no longer functioning, but at least it was still attached. Bennett finished his spell tying Chris to the floor for most of the last over, and he took the fact we stole one of his wickets in the interests of sportsmanship in good grace. 35 overs this season for the Jags, at a 5.92 economy rate with 13 wickets. Not too shabby.

Boud replaced Brett at the other end and having seen Tyler and Liam, thought, I fancy some of that. He got Freddie bowled first ball, deceiving him with a slightly short of a length one that didn't get up as high as he had expected. Turner (1st team man) came to the crease, and Boud bowled so so well he almost got a 1 wicket maiden, false shots, millimeters from the stumps, the whole shooting match, before they whistled a single by fluke (it came near me, sorry Jake).

The other end, it was Barker's turn to impress everyone, and this he did, also tying down Chris for a spell with his patented Cambourne balls. He's taken a leaf out of the Bennett playbook this week, using his angry face to try and intimidate people in his run up. There were almost a couple of run outs, so keen were the batsmen to get off strike. Sawyer was once more in the action in this department, always keen for a direct hit.

Call me Lassie. One. More. Time.

Bowling changes are supposed to bring respite to the batsmen, particularly in this format, but there was none of it. It was pretty dominant and Histon were a long way behind the rate.

Chris Mailes had by this point scored about 6 runs off 30 balls and survived an LBW, so he decided to try and starting swinging. He hit a hilarious 4 through cover, Ant was well stationed to stop it, but gently moonwalked backwards and ushered the ball through, worried as he was about any damage it might do to his dealing hand. Unshackled a little bit, Chris then plonked a 6 onto the top of the batting nets from Boud, and it took a random dad about 5 goes to give us our ball back. Fielding was still consistent, and anything wayward from Boud or Barker was snaffled by Phillips the Cat. Chris and Turner started unleashing a bit more, concious that the target rate was high, and a nice 4 to backward square from Turner, and a few strikes from Mailes, before the scariest moment of the night when Chris hit a straight 6 from Barker back over the bowler's head, clearing the site screen and almost murdering some grannies playing bowls.

Chris picks his target

Morgan Yaxley then came into the attack, and after a couple of wides from the current resident umpire Freddie (his Xbox chum no less) he claimed Chris, finding him trying a late cut to short third man, where Sawyer snaffled the chance. Some notable fielding from Cozzie again in the deep, going one way and the other before stretching out a paw to catch one happened around this point. Tyler also was having a stormer in the field, almost scoring a direct hit run out from long on, and throwing with absolute precision each time he was called upon.

Sabin, a regular Jag chose this moment to join the fray and Sawyer twirled the arm in partnership with Yaxley. Morgan is called "The Yack" in the book, and I think that is better than Yaxkey of earlier this season. Still, Sawyer was called "Soya Bean" in the book, and I don't think that will stick at all.

Sabin struggled to score and then also hilariously having not scored, pinched the strike from Mr Turner on the last ball of a not at all productive over facing the Yack, and laughed at the hilarity of what he'd done, before he even finished completing the run. Histon were miles behind now, and yet the chirp was brilliant, the fielding more so, and the only question was whether we could keep them below 100. Turner fell to Sawyer in amusing fashion, ball bowled, hoiked high to short midwicket, Yaxley was there but Sawyer absolutely screamed "mine" to ensure the caught and bowled fell to him. 

Fraser Christie joined us for the last phase of action, and helped Histon get the 100, and offered a really nice amount of chat at the end. All of us laughed heartily when he forced Sabin to take a risky two runs by screaming, as the ball went to Tyler, "run, he's got no arm". Oh how we laughed. Except Tyler. He definitely didn't laugh.

The final phase of action saw Sabin hit a single-ish to Sawyer, who knew Fraser would take the suicidal pointless last run, picked up the ball, waited for Fraser to pass him, then threw down the stumps with Fraser in, out, who cares - he dived and it was bloody hilarious.

It's just a shame Sawyer's Mum had left long before he did all these good things.

Hands were shaken, smiles were exchanged, and a genuinely amazing all round bowling and fielding performance with virtually no errors or looseness was the prize for the second half of the innings. The first half of the game had been all about one man; the second half was all team.

The Red Lion in Histon is a fine pub, and so we retired there, with good representation from both teams, and plenty of decent chat and nice beverages.

A Chuffing Draw

Cambridge Tamil Sangam 124/7 (Chanrasekar 30*, Sivakumar 26, Bennet 3-18) DREW with The Jags 124/5 (Barker 21*, Ranjit 17, Nagadev 2-15)

Man of the Match - Bennett

We have drawn before, but this is the first time I can remember in a long long time. This team is a new one on us, I understand they are a Tamil disapora, mainly from mainland India originally. Nice fellas. Queens, we bloody lost the toss again, so as sure as day follows night we were put into field. A slightly makeshift XI saw Paul Cooper make his Jags debut. 

Bennett and Savage got things underway, Bennett was on one this week, as he has been of late. He was aided by getting a wicket early with Ant catching a screamer at slip above his head. Ant and Tyler even made friends briefly as a results of this. 

How an Ant and Bennett friendship might look

Tyler was bowling that scary stuff he does sometimes, so the batsmen tried to go at Savage a bit more than him. Paul Cooper replaced Savage debuting for the Jags took a while to find his line, and then bowled a man off full toss that he somehow re-directed onto his own wickets via an edge I believe. 

This lead to the moment of the night, or indeed any night.

Tyler bowled a full length ball and the batsman nailed a wallop over mid off. Chris Mailes set off to try and field it. The batsmen didn't run, confident of the 4 that was coming, Chris stumbled, then dived and grasped the ball millimeters from the turf at full stretch. The batman was absolutely incredulous, and stood there in disbelief for a full 10 seconds before trudging off. 

The rest of the innings saw Chris demonstrate that he was also in fact human and dropping an absolute dolly a few balls later.  

This week we had regular Morgs back, no doubt encouraged by not having to bowl after Ant, and he mixed up some fantastic lines, with strong economy and a bowled full toss for good measure. Freddie absolutely nailed a direct hit run out - pausing before absolutely murdered the stumps and Savage, having taken a little bit of tap in his early overs, managed to pull it back by switching his line and nailing a death over. I was dinged at the end by the opposition, as a batsman hit it to deep square and it stopped, I picked it up and threw it in and they were adamant that I had crossed the line making it a 4, with two of their guys actually getting down on the ground to look for the spike mark. 

Gents, I did not cross the line, and this is not McEnroe at Wimbledon. Also, to anyone who knows me, can you imagine me even thinking about cheating? There is more chance of Ant becoming an MP.

Ant and I started things off, getting a few first over, before Ant tucked in to the second over like Homer Simpson at an all you can eat buffet. 3 consecutive 4's were plundered and he then turned down a single to leave me on the strike to the other bowler, who had been a bit quicker. 

"All you can eat" is a lie

I then took a gentle single on my way to my highest score of June or July, 9. Woohoo. This left Ant to get himself out, playing one on by fishing wide of off when he could have left well enough alone. 

Chris joined me in the middle for a bit and the rapid early scoring meant we were on for an easy chase. Once again, it got dark quickly. I fell LBW, sad to be out, but glad of spending more time at the crease than it took to walk to and from it. Chris and Freddie got going, Chris hitting some good stuff, and Freddie running well. There was some calamity, pushing back for a tight but gettable second, Chris was run out by a direct hit. Barker did the inevitable and moved the scoring rapidly along. Freddie fell very unfortunately, he absolutely nailed a beauty to cow, but picked probably the only fielder that could have held it.

We looked on for the chase here, comfortable really, Barker in the middle, Ranjit joining him, but it was very very dark at this point. This time of year, winning the toss is key. We then just stopped scoring. Dot dot dot dot dot, single. Dot dot dot dot dot, single, was the passage of play for two overs. We then did a little bit of scoring, a nice shot behind square from Ranjit and Barker doing Barker things, and trying to run singles and 2's when the opportunity presented itself.

We were still well on for the chase at 18 needed from 24, plenty of players to come at 4 down, and then... you know what happened. Lots and lots of dots, and the odd single, to leave us needing 13 from 15, I mean easy right. Well nope.

We got 7 from the next 9 and there was a total of 6 to win from 6 balls. Still totally got this right boys. Loads of batters in the hutch, just don't go for dots. 

Oh dear, dot. 

Oh dear, wicket. Ranjit bowled. 

6 from 4 needed.

5 from 3.

Wide! 4 from 3.

2 runs from 2 balls.

Cooper with the task in the dark. 2 needed off 2, dot... and we pinched a single for a draw mainly as Barker understood the match situation and ran like he does.

A draw and some backchat from the opposition about how my boundary field had cost them the game. It didn't gents, our judicious application of dots, lack of urgency, and the dark skies cost us the game.

Good pub attendance again. We got pizza this week but it was slow. Ah well, more beer time and plenty of opportunity to chat with Mr Paul Yaxley about how utterly wonderful it sounds to be retired.

Chipset Challenge

Qualcomm 164/6 (Hasan 63, Bennet 2-22) beat The Jags 127/6 (Ant 29, Barker 27, Threadgold 20, Hasan 2-22)

Man of the Match - Barker

Our skipper was away this week, and unlike the previous week's weirdness, this was a genuine old school beating. We were complicit in our defeat it must be said.

Qualcomm won the toss (boys, come on, key to each week) and we fielded. Tyler and Liam did their classic opening double act, Liam being unplayable, and Bennett getting the wickets as a result. Scoring was slow to start with, the fielding was good and we looked like we'd keep them to a sensible score. Boud came in and did ok, but got pushed about a bit.

One opener fell (the more mobile of the duo shall we say, as the other one wasn't pinching any singles) trying to up the rate, pushing to square and giving me an easy run out to Phillips behind the stumps.

 Sorry pal, boundaries or bust for me

Tyler caught and bowled one, I think it was absolutely leathered at him, but I may be wrong. Savage bowled a good one top of middle I think, and Boud caught and bowled one. They hadn't scored quickly and we were facing number 2 and number 6 and chirping about being into the tail soon. Savage was captaining and Ant absolutely insisted that he'd been in the nets and his bowling was good.

The over that followed turned this from a well drilled fielding team with good figures into an absolute bloody shower of shite. In fact, I've never seen an over so turn a game on its head. It was 8 of the worst balls ever seen on a cricket field. 8 ball over as well.

Doomsday - A surprisingly good film about a night out in Glasgow. Also a word to describe Ant's over. A perfectly apt word.

Ant's doomsday over singled handedly gave them hope. The larger opener actual started scoring and poor Morgs was left to bowl after Ant at their other man. With a spring in his step he laid into everything on this way to a rapid 63 with Morgs seeing his bowling go mostly into orbit. Bennett gets Liam as support, Morgs gets Ant. That's just not fair. The fielding fell apart and it was all just a bit shit as they coasted to 164. Bennett eventually got the other opener and Dan ran out the slowest man to ever play cricket with a purposeful direct hit run out, but thanks to Ant, the entire team suddenly got the yips.

Mark and Ant opened the batting - and as with the week before as we strolled out the clouds rolled in. Ant scored quickly, I didn't and was then bowled with my feet in cement. George and Ant put on a decent partnership but goodness me it was dark. We might have had a chance with sunlight or 130 odd to chase, but it was the worst of all possible worlds. Ant fell going big, Barker then played a lovely hand, stealing the strike repeatedly to make sure he had fun no matter what. George was bowled. Threadgold came in and with the game so so lost at this point, he and Barker set out having fun, hitting the ball to the sightscreen and beyond and just having fun. 

We fell well short, undone by some batting brilliance, but honestly it was like a voodoo hex happened midway through our fielding innings. And the voodoo was caused by Ant. It wasn't nice voodoo, more the slightly shitting variety from middling horror films.

Some people went to the pub, and again there was no pizza.

Mulched by the Maths

Madingley Mulch (120/5, Manju 24*, Bennett 2-17) beat the Jags (117/6, Parrish 37, Mailes 23, Ruwan 3-13) by 3 runs

Man of the Match - Parrish

I've started a new job which means I haven't had time with the match reports, and this is a few weeks out of synch - so it will be abbreviated and just contain the bits I can piece together from the darker recesses of my 41 year old brain.

The thing that most sticks in the mind about this game is the fact that nothing added up. We were at Queens, looking to get back to high scoring fun and japes. Madingley Mulch won the toss (a theme recently) and wisely decided to bat and put on 120.

Except that they clearly didn't. The batting column in the book says they scored 103. The bowling column in the book says they scored 103. This includes extras. There aren't 120 runs in the book except in the totals column. I'm never going to accuse anyone of cheating without proof, and they seemed like nice fellas, but this just didn't add up, by a massive massive amount. Ah well, we don't want to get promoted anyway.

How to make GCSE maths really hard

I remember Brett and Bennett opening the bowling for us, Brett was doing his classic, too good at bowling to actually get wickets. Weather was nice. Bennett was angry, and the fielding was mostly good. Scoring was very slow to start with, Bennett got one caught by Dan at mid on I think (and he tried to fumble it a lot) and he also bowled one, I think it was top of off with pace, but it is a few weeks ago. Brett plundered on, and honestly I think half of Bennett's wickets are down to Brett. 

Boud, Yaxley and Savage had a bowl. Scoring was still super slow, and Boud had one almost maiden that involved a ripper of a bowled one with one run conceded in the over. Savage kept things interesting and also conceded 2 runs off an over. The scoreboard jumped from 40 to 69 in these two overs. Parrish walked over to the sidelines and politely enquired how 3 runs in 2 overs had pushed the scoring up by 30 odd, and they went to adjust the scoreboard, but only took 9 off. I'm guessing this was when the calculator broke.

Morgs bowled nicely, I recall Boud dropping two catches, and the fielding getting a bit ragged. Barker caught one from Morgs, and Ben Savage threw down the stumps for a nice run out. Parrish did things behind the stumps, they had one partnership, which oddly enough was between two gentleman who are both called Manju. 120/5, not a bad total to face at our home ground, and we'd feel confident with Mailes and Parrish opening the batting.

Scoring was very slow to start with, the bowling that I remember was very good, more spin than I have seen in an evening and the fielding was good. Light drew in quickly, and we were probably well behind the rate initially. Chris was struggling to score and playing some gorgeous pre Bazball Test Match on Day 3 strokes. Matt took his time, but then start punching to the deep and eventually fell bowled for 37 having upped his strike rate to over 120. Threadgold joined Chris, and Chris shortly thereafter perished going to cow for a 4. Fielding was pretty top notch all round at this point.

The wicket keeper had a broken finger. Did I mention that? He still batted and got 20 odd, kept for 10 overs or so and then decided to have a bowl as I walked out. I'm having an absolute fucker of a season on a personal basis, but the ball that he got me with would have cleaned me up at any time in my life on any form. My first golden duck that I can recall (I have plenty of ducks, dear reader, but this is my first genuinely shiny golden one that I can recall). 

Phillips joined Threadgold and did Phillips things - running hard and Dan eventually fell stumped. I'm going to blame Phillips, mainly as I can't remember seeing this one. Phillips and Barker pushed the scoring hard, Phillips was run out, Barker was caught - and Barker had us very very close at the end as he'd kept the scoring rate high, skipping out of his crease. Brett and Boud were left with the last few balls task, which no one envies, and we didn't quite get home. 

Everyone shook hands and they seemed nice bunch, the book made no sense, and we technically lost, but I'm pretty sure we actually won comfortably. Cricket is a funny old game. I'm going to suggest that none of their number try accountancy out as a career. Red Cow was well attended, but we were too late for pizza.

A Selection Committee

Jags (174-1, Parrish 90*!, Dunn 60 Mailes 18*) beat the Dobblers (157/5 S Dobb 44, L Dobb 25, Savage 3-23) by 17 runs. 

 MOTM- Parrish

On an overcast June evening, the Jags continued their league campaign by facing the visit of the Dobblers at Queens. Notable returnees for the match included Steve Mann, Alex Dunn and Chris Mailes. The scorecard available online lists the Jags as only the ten for the match, there was much discussion in the leadup to the match on the strict selection policy for the XI, A Brolia was named in the matchday squad, but alas decided that with only the prospect of a fielding stint available, other matters took priority.

The pitch for tonight’s game looked soft – overnight rain before the game making all involved grateful to get a game on. Something happened at the toss, which I do not recall, the net result saw Matt and Dunny walking out to open the batting for the Jags. The Dobblers XI included several familiar faces, most significantly for tonight’s game was Oscar Fry, teammate at Histon but was opening the bowling tonight.

In the early exchanges, ball dominated bat a couple of edges falling safely, the openers happy to block and leave for the opening passage of play. The outfield was wet from the previously mentioned rain, making 2s and 3s an option for shots that normally were going to the ropes. Having seen the threat of Fry off (0-10(4)) with remarkable patience in a T20, Matt and Alex enjoyed some looser bowling as the changes had to be made. A real feature of the partnership was the running between the wickets, dots were turned to 1’s, 1’s into 2’s etc. Only a couple of times were the batters ever close to jeopardy, the Dobblers not quite able to find the direct hit that could have got a wicket.

The partnership accelerated through the middle overs, Dunny being the first to bring up 50, his second in as many games for the Jags, another wise selection call from Parrish. As the partnership continued to blossom, the other members of the Jags rested ever easier in their seats. A strong crowd had gathered infront of the Queen’s pavilion, Tyler certainly preoccupied with his +1, the Sidemen (look them up, or on second thoughts don’t bother) being the entertainment for the night. 

Back with everyone else’s entertainment this evening, Matt crossed to 50 as well, continuing his fine form in all competitions. The opening partnership continued on it’s merry way, both batters finding the boundary with good regularity, the score 122-0 after 15 (six ball) overs. Looking to accelerate the the innings in the final quarter, an optimistic 2 was called, Dunny unfortunately run out for a cracking 60. Chris in at 3, with just a few overs to cash in at the death.

The two of them were able to score regularly off the change bowlers at the death, Chris finishing the innings with an impressive maximum, and earning himself another red inker at 18*

The man of the moment however and without a doubt the player of the match, Matt walked off the field having batted all 20 overs, finishing on 90*. A great physical effort to be out for all of the Jags 174 runs. A true captain’s innings.

Fully deserving of a break, Matt decided not to take the gloves tonight. This brought a flurry of ideas for replacement keepers, Barker was chosen to take the responsibility. The traditional opening partnership of Liam and Tyler was restored this week, the Jags knew that some early wickets or dot ball pressure would see the rate rise steeply.

Early goings were steady, the dobblers openers playing the balls on it’s merits, the outfield hadn’t quickened up so there was still lots of running between the wickets to be done. Sharp fielding from the Jags’ ten men cut down the runs from the field. The openers picked up the occasional boundary enough to keep the run rate in check.

Savage replaced Brett from the tennis court end and was able to keep the ball in the park, Sawyer being kept busy on the midwicket boundary before being introduced into the attack himself from the far end. Sawyer’s bowling is always a great watch, in the same way as Bazball, every ball is an event! An early stumping chance thanks to Barker’s fast hands was turned away by the ever attentive square leg ump. The run rate was kept in check by the well organised openers, the game still waiting for the first genuine wicket for a bowler in the 30thover. 

Finally, the breakthrough was made, Savage finding the outside edge, well taken by Barker behind the sticks. The batter not happy to be given out, even the non-striker agreeing that the decision was correct. The dobbler’s other opener did not last much longer either, unwisely advancing to Sawyer’s leggies, Barker in the game again, no trouble in giving that stumping.

The middle order had to come out playing their shots because of the steep run rate, Savage collected another thanks to a good running catch from Sawyer in the deep. The jags earning reward for their ‘good lines’ (J Barker 29/6/23). Savage earnt a third from the final ball of his set, dislodging the leg stump. A hat trick ball to come next time.

Mann came into the attack, his economy was hurt from the extras, but otherwise bowled well, the run rate building against the Dobblers. Chris came in and fired up the cele-appeal right away, an LBW shout turning to celebration when the bail was dislodged.

He could have had a second, Sawyer involved in field again, called the catch before spilling it. Thankfully for him, the jags selection policy has already got a head on the block, so we might have him back.

Liam and T were reintroduced to complete their spells and the game two, a great top-order batting performance and a sound effort in the field sees the jags go four for four in the league, keeping the top spot in the table.

Pub turnout might have been good, but I wasn’t there, so cannot comment.

Hardwick and Caldecott next up at Queens – 6th July.

Swaffham Showdown

Jags (102-9, Barker 31, Parrish 29, Wade-Gledhill 3-20) beat The Swaffhams (90-9, Masters 22, Yaxley 3-21) by 12 runs.

Man of the Match: 

The Jags continued their league campaign this week with a visit to the quaint village of Swaffham. The appearance of the pitch encouraged the batters initially, though rain earlier in the week brought the bowlers to ascendancy for much of the game. The team featured many of the usual suspects, with the last-minute addition of Freddie Meldal another of the Histon CC youth contingent in for a Jags debut in the place of Fardell, who it seams had made some ill-advised selection of chicken shops earlier the weekthat had brought him down with gastrointestinal issues, our thoughts are with your bathroom Mark!

Parrish lost the toss with the hosts electing to field first. Normality returned to the batting order this week, Parrish and Brolia to open up, aiming to get the Jags away to a good start. Matt got the innings off in traditional style, latching on to a full toss first up, sending it to the ropes. The batters were dreaming of what was to come for the rest of the day.

Unfortunately, the wicket began to show demons from the second over, a genuine half-tracker first up from Durrant did for Ant, who played the correct shot for any wicket with an inch of bounce in it.

Threadgold escaped parenting to come in at 3, along with Matt, they sent several loose balls to the fence. Dan fell to a top edge to square leg bringing Phillips in at 4. Ant (scoring at this point) assured the group that he would ‘film every ball because somethings going to happen’. Which he did for every delivery except the one where something happened, with Phillips dismissed. Citing a bloke reading a book as a distraction that led to his dismissal.

Coslett’s innings was alas short lived a rare slip catch in midweek cricket was well taken. Matt needed a partner to hang around on a wicket which had plenty going on. Barker, free of the constraints of A levels came in to face the hat trick ball. With no further damage done the Jags batters settled in to rebuild the innings, knowing that anything around the hundred mark would put us in good shape for the second innings.

It took a fantastically village bit of cricket to dismiss the captain, an outside edge was found, the ball goes in and out of the keeper’s gloves, dropping straight into the left hand of the slip fielder. Meldal in next, took his time to stay in, supporting Barker and accumulating valuable extras for the total. Wickets continued to fall, those of us fortunate enough to be batting in the lower order began to sit a little less comfortably.

As he began to run out of partners, Barker opened his arms to good effect, hitting 6 then 4 off Swaffham’s young bowler. He eventually fell in the final over, chasing quick runs. There was little to write home about from the lower order, the Jags finishing on a par total of 102. 

A quick turnaround is always important in an evening game, even if we were playing on the solstice. It wasn’t long before Liam had the ‘new’ pink ball in hand. The Jags were faced with the unenviable task of a right – left opening partnership, making Matt’s captaincy work extra hard. As ever, Liam bowled with metronomic accuracy up top. Alas the same could not be said from the other end. Savage struggled to find an area and was hit all around the ground, hence the swift introduction of Jake who hit the ground running far better. 

Brett made the first breakthrough; a healthy edge was comfortably taken by Matt behind the sticks. Despite Swaffham making a good dent in the total at first, the Jags recovered well, slowing the rate. Jake took the big wicket of Jordan Haynes, Cossie taking a comfortable catch at mid-on.

With wickets falling around him, the Swaffham opener returned to his shell, only depriving Liam of an eight-ball maiden with a single from the final ball. The Jags bowled well to recover control of the scoring rate through the middle overs. Morgan, also free of exams replaced Liam and took the significant wicket of the Swaffham opener, Yaxley making good use of the zing bails to send the batter packing. Savage returned to the attack aiming to recover his figures from dire to bad. The combination of the bowlers restricted scoring to make the batters take some undue risks.

A questionable single was taken to backward point. In a quick sweeping action, Jake scooped up the ball and threw the stumps down, the batter kept running to the pavilion despite some indecisive umpiring, the correct decision was made. Utter chaos then ensued when the new batter came to the crease. A short ball, wide of the stumps was hit via an under edge in the direction of Barker at square leg. As time stood still, Alan Shearer appeared before us all as his great right boot half volleyed the ball into the back of the net. The batter was unfortunate to be on his way without facing, the square leg umpire, with beer in hand, could only chuckle as he lifted the finger.

From there in, the jags bowled fairly effectively, Savage was hit into the play park to cap off a fairly dire night for him. Morgan continued to take wickets from the other end, one was bowled, the other well taken by Liam at long on.

Freddie was brought on to complete the requirement of 5 bowlers, and bowled well, claiming a wicket and keeping the batters to ones and twos. The last over arrived, Jake was left with 15 runs to play with, effective dot ball pressure led to an easy run out for Parrish, capping off another fine day for him behind the stumps. A great effort from Jake, conceding only 2 from the final set. A fairly solid win from the jags on a soft wicket saw them move to the top of the league table. Edging perilously close to promotion.

Pub turnout was excellent, all the members were treated well thanks to the landlady’s generosity in providing free chips. A string of home games in the weeks to come should see some higher scoring games.

Ploughing the Slope

Jags 132-0 (Brolia 28*, Threadgold 28*, Anderson 28*, Sawyer 26*) beat Sharks 130-6 (Rob 26*, Ackers 26*, Brett 3-13) by 10 wickets

This match report is written with both the benefit and the fog of a week having passed since the game was played. There may be some details forgotten, made up or enhanced for dramatic effect as a result.

We took to Fen Ditton's slopey fields in nice weather against old foes the Sharks. The Ditton track looked much better than I ever remember it looking, but the slope and the ability to lose bags of cricket balls to the Plough in Fen Ditton is, well, it's a bit of a design flaw really isn't it. The slope, granted you 'can' pretend it's like Lords and just accept it as being home team advantage. The lack of a fence, or net or well, you know anything really to stop you losing cricket balls is, well, it feels like an underinvestment from the good people in Fen Ditton. Looking at house prices there, perhaps they have no spare cash to help fund the club.

This match was something of a one sided affair, and the scorebook tells the same story, but lots of things happened that almost made it close, so I will write more anon. In the meantime this was the best ironic graphic I could come up with.

It really really wasn't this, many people did not good things on the field

The skipper was late and I was left with the coin tossing duty, and duly lost so the Sharks put themselves in to bat. Zak and AB opened for them, with Brett and Benjamin Savage taking bowling duties. Liam is on one at the moment, and thus it continued with near immaculate control and line and length making it hard as nails to score or survive. He was aided by a Reader I bought from MR Cricket, which still got the customary guffaws and laughter from the team. The issue with Liam bowling as well as this, is that whoever is bowling the other end, well they're not going to try and take Liam on, let's put it that way, hence Savage getting whacked for a few, before AB trying to go "downtown" and instead went "uptown" skying it high and deep. Threadgold made it look as though it was swirling, shifting and landing safely, itching back and forth like a man with a nasty rash, before eventually he caught it over his shoulder. I honestly didn't think from the way he moved a catch was ever in prospect until he held it. He even letter out funny "oo-eer" noise whilst trying to find the ball.

Rob stepped out for the Sharks, and he is both a gentleman and class act, playing himself in with some technically correct shots, perhaps sensing that his wicket would be very valuable to keep in the context of the narrative about to unfold. Zak perished shortly thereafter thinly edging from Liam to Matt behind the stumps, generously walking without pause. Jim walked out, a man who has devastated our bowling over the years, but not tonight. He was caught in two minds and gently pushed his first ball high to backward point, where George took an easy chance. Pat joined the fray, a man who has destroyed our bowling over the years with golf/hockey shots that are perfectly effective. I think he kept one out then edged one law, again to George at backward point, where George nonchalantly took it just above the turf with one hand, right at the last possible second. Like one handed grabs with your left hand are just a "thing".

George's actual pose a second before taking the catch

Marc came out for the Sharks and he and Rob set about keeping the game alive by, mostly, doing the sensible thing and not getting out to Liam. Jags debutant, and our first Saffer in a long long time, Chris Mailes, came in to bowl. He was little wayward at first but found his lines. Toby joined him and was a little wayward at first, then got a little bit more wayward later, but it was fine as we'd had the most ridiculous start. Liam had a 3 wicket maiden for chuffs sake.

Then something happened to our collective brains. I think the flurry of 4 big wickets inside of 5 overs, the very low score, (I think they were 3-4 at one point or something equally befuddling) and the allure of the wonderful Plough in Fen Ditton meant we collectively made a decision to field like a bunch of muppets. 

Next year's recruits turning up for training

I started things off by falling over a ball at backward square. Threadgold decided that backing up is for other people. I dived round a ball, which the laws of physics don't really allow, but somehow I managed it, and Savage dropped a real sitter. There were lots of other instances, but it's been a week and I'm trying to erase the trauma. 

To further up the scoring rate for the opposition, we decided to give Ant a go at bowling. Ant's numbers in the book are good. To watch in real life, it was not good. His first ball almost killed the batsman, Ant actually apologised within a nanosecond of it leaving his hand. His other balls should mostly have been called no balls, or wides, or just a new rule called "Ant". He was proud of his figures, he should not be proud of the highlights reel.

The batsmen accumulated gently, with Rob hitting some very nice shots to both off and legside, playing it late, good foot movement. He had clearly sensed his role and formed a useful partnership with Marc to get Sharks into scoring territory. Toby had been a bit wayward, but his wicket ball was one of the best I've seen bowled from a spinner - great length, faster that it looks, turning in and connecting with the top of off. Marc was sent back, but in truth there was little he could have done.

Sawyer then came in as, "he had bowled well before", but not this week. No sirree bob. The batsmen duly cashed in, and the only high point reached at this stage of the game was height the ball was sailing past the fielders as the length, line, pitch and everything was a total and utter mess. He wasn't aided by the fielders of course. 

Rob the batsman duly retired and Ackers and Joe scored some runs quite comfortably against some of our bowlers. Things were very flat in the field, with the Sharks getting a decent ish total on the board. Ackers retired, various Jags tried to shout at or encourage each other to some cricketing things, and the incoming batsman Ammad took a very open stance and massive shine to Sawyer's absolute crud stuff and bludgeoned him to all corners.

Ant was replaced by Phillips, and he bowled not too bad, although a run out was missed because I embraced the spirit of the evening and decided to try and lawn bowl the batsman out. If it had hit the stumps, maybe it would have been hailed as genius. Dear Reader, it didn't hit the stumps. It was both not in line with the stumps and not quite powerful enough to either reach them or dislodge the bails had it been in line.

Now's your chance to be a hero, Marky, don't blow it...

The free hitting Amman was caught by Chris Mailes off Phillips and Brett came back to finish things. He had some insane figures at this point, and was bowling at a young tail ender, so much so that the Sharks umpires said please be nice. We're always nice. 

Liam duly obliged by giving the young man a couple of sighters outside off. Deliberately bowling a fine edge for him, and then putting a few unplayable ones outside off, pretty much ruining his figures in the process, or so he told me. Except when I look at the book, 4 overs, 13 runs, 3 wickets. Not too shabby. 130-6 to chase. 

A slightly changed opening batting partnership of Ant and Sawyer took about their work with a minimum of fuss, aided by some fairly friendly bowling it must be said. Ant in particular was in a hurry to get to Milton - no rollicking in the field for him on video chat with his lady this week - he absolutely spanked the ball, pretty much entirely to the legside to get out of their on 28* sharpish. The book doesn't record the number of balls, but it was not a lot. One clip to square off his toes was dreamy. He basically cantered off the field, said his goodbyes on the way to the car and got the second part of his evening underway quick sharp. I won't write any details about his post cricket activities here in case this blog is being carefully followed by law enforcement.

Sawyer was a touch more reserved, joined now by Dan. Both got going, Sawyer with a nice late cut and Dan with a club/bludgeon to midwicket that I can recall. The only moment of alarm was when Sawyer hit the ground with his bat nowhere near the ball and I as umpire briefly forgot the rules of cricket on hearing an appeal from the keeper, and debated giving him out - until I came to my senses and realised that he needed to hit the ball to be caught out. 

Sawyer started to look classy, and Dan was scoring without ever really looking like he had a clue what he was doing, but there were no caught chances, no slowing of the rate and nothing really of note apart from some memorable shots. The bowling was tame, other than AB who was tight and controlled.

How the bowling was V How it is supposed to be

Sawyer finished with a square cut that oozed class and a beastly pull that exuded power. Job done. George came in and quickly got up to pace, hitting a couple of 4's supported by Dan who hit a couple of nice late blows to retire. George was joined by Liam and George hit some wonderful shots, less casual with bat than when fielding but no less effective with a hook that I can recall just flying away. We lost 5 or 6 balls at the end, as the Plough boundary was peppered every other ball. George retired with a drive, leaving Liam and Toby to bring it home. Oddly the first two balls Toby faced were great, spice and venom and all that, but it was too late and we got where we needed to be.

Pub attendance and chat was great, I do love the Plough.

The Home of Cricket

Jags 163-5 (Dunn 62*, Brolia 38, Parrish 28, Panigrahi 2-17, Rodriguez 2-21) beat Waterbeach 123-7 (Jones 41, Talaga 27, Sawyer 3-26) by 40 runs.

POTM- Alex Dunn

On a sunny yet cool June evening, the Jags returned to Queens for the first home game of the year. Several absentees this week meant that the XI was supplemented with one of Histon’s most premier batters, Alex Dunn alongside much of the usual group of regulars. Mr Fardell had decided that some match at Lords was more significant than this business house 2 league game, so in his absence I, Savage, have taken honorary blog responsibilities.

We arrived to find the ground in as beautiful condition as ever, the chequered striped outfield was remarked upon most frequently by the team. Regular readers of the blog will recall the dire condition of the opposition’s, Waterbeach, ground in the reverse fixture last year. We were all thankful for the more even condition of the pitch for this year’s game.

Captain fantastic won the toss (after a 5 min hunt for a coin) and elected to make first use of the pitch with bat in hand. The seasoned opening partnership of Parrish and Brolia (our resident footgolf world cup finalist) set out to the middle to face the Waterbeach attack. Not for the first time this year, we were off the mark from the first delivery, a waist high no ball dutifully pulled away by Matt for 4.

The bowling was accurate, without being initially potent, allowing Matt to keep the scoreboard ticking, while Ant reacclimatised to sport on this side of the pond. Parrish continued to score the bulk of the runs, with many 2’s scored to the wide Queens boundaries. When Parish eventually fell for a well-made 28 to a good catch in the covers, the score was 36-1 (5) – a solid start. Dunny entered the fray at number 3, fresh off a cracking 50 in the Walker cup on Sunday. He began his innings patiently, with beautiful front foot defensives, right out of the ECB coaching manual. With the new batter in, Ant capitalised on some loose bowling to advance his total with 3X4’s in quick succession. The score moving on to 73-1 at the halfway point of our 20 over innings.

The first change bowler particularly caught the attention of the team, being identified as Lumber of Cottenham CC. Fortunately he was met with Dunny’s now swinging blade, who played 2 beautiful consecutive drives down the ground for maximums.

It took a beautiful looping full toss to remove Ant, who was bowled for a swashbuckling 38(26). Phillips strode out to the middle at number 4, his stay was alas short lived before he fell in the same over to a now well pumped-up Rodriguez. Barker entered the fray and got his innings underway with 1’s and 2’s into the gaps. Dunny was rolling now, having made short work of the 30’s and 40’s, he made it to 50 with a shot over midwicket for 4. Well batted sir.

In the meantime, Ant had caught his breath following his exploits with bat in hand enough to form a love shack facetime call with his +1. A touching moment, that he chose to share while lying in a bush.

The last over of the innings arrived and brought the end of Barker’s supportive innings of 11. Coslett had the unenviable job of swinging for the last 5 balls. He was very successful in this, finding open pasture on the leg side, pushing back for the third to get Dunny on strike, he was alas run out thanks to a strong return from the deep. Sawyer entered the middle to run 5 runs and not face a ball. Jags finished on a strong 163-5, knowing that early wickets would surely make the run rate unachievable.

Brett began the innings with usual economical accuracy. With the batter unsettled, a quick leg bye was attempted. The skipper bounded forwards ripped off a glove and threw down the stumps. The batter was well short at the non-strikers and their opener was back in the shed without score. 

Tyler opened from the other end but was treated firmly by Lumber. Dot balls at the other batter ensured that the required run rate continued to add up. Liam’s metronomic accuracy allowed the batters only to milk singles to the deep, the rate was soon getting away from the chasing team. Toby replaced Tyler only to be slogged away to cow for a maximum first ball. Not to worry, T made the adjustment, flighted the ball up and got the batter down the track to be stumped comfortably by Matt.

At this point Lumber was starting to find his stride, finding the long Queens boundary with ease. Despite this, Brett came back on for his third over with a gleam of hope in his eyes. A secret council with Barker at mid-on and an apparent “wobble seam” now in his locker led to back-to-back rising deliveries to start the over. Fans watching from the Barton Road end would have seen Brett’s grin and resolute nod as he moved to the top of his run out. Lumber had played at two and missed two. The pieces were in place. We all knew what was coming. It was time for The Cutter™.

The run up was smooth and fluid, the arm slightly higher than his stock ball, delivered from a few inches wider on the crease. His fingers expertly manipulated the seam, imparting revolutions at speeds few can achieve. The lure was cast, and the fish were hungry. Lumber took a step down the pitch, seeing the ball was there to be hit. A shock of fear across his face as the ball dipped early, then cut up and in with perfect precision. All he could do was try to work it through midwicket off the splice. 

Time stopped. The most dangerous player on the team had chipped one up for a sitter. The Jags followed the ball without concern - the celebrations had already begun in our heads. The fielder stood motionless. What was he doing? Brett dropped to his knees. The writing was on the wall. The ball was on the floor. Queens went silent.

“Oh you fu… Phillips”, said Liam. Defeat in his voice.

No other words were spoken, the ball returned to the bowler. Both the non-striker and the umpire gave an apologetic shake of the head as Brett passed them by, the gleam of hope replaced by a grim look of acceptance of the reality he is now forced to face. His next ball was pumped for 4. I hope he doesn’t hold grudges.

Savage was introduced following the conclusion of Liam’s spell, bowling without great pace, drew dots and singles from good balls. The occasional shorter ball was sent to the boundary by the opposition’s strong number 3. A particularly tight single to Dunny at point resulted in the next wicket for the jags. A good throw in gave Parrish enough time to whip the bails of to send beach’s number 4 packing.

Purton completed his spell from the far end to be replaced by our leg spinning sensation, Ben Sawyer. The initial grip and spin excited the fielders. As a few extras clocked up on the board, the batter reached wide of off stump, collecting a thin edge on the way into Matt’s welcoming gloves. This brought the new batter to the crease, an U15 from Histon, who our own Liam regularly coaches. His first ball was played respectfully back to the bowler, unfortunately Sawyer’s next ball was too hot to handle as the catch was taken by guess who in the covers. Liam offering no special treatment on that one.

Tyler changed ends to tidy up for his final 2 and took the off stump of Waterbeach’s strong keeper-batter sound 41. With the victory nailed down, the field tightened for the final few overs. Sawyer added a 3rd thanks to a comfortable catch by Toby at mid-on, demonstrating to the rest of the team how to do it when he is bowling. The lower order came in and played some risky shots, finishing the match with an aerial boundary over mid-off. The jags took the victory by a comfortable 40 runs.

The team retired to the Bull, where Ant came up trumps with a solid pizza order, earning forgiveness for the ball which he decided was not worthy of his fielding.

A beautiful evening ended with the Jags going 2 from 2 in the league, moving up to second in the table. Roll on the Sharks on Monday.