A Chuffing Draw

Cambridge Tamil Sangam 124/7 (Chanrasekar 30*, Sivakumar 26, Bennet 3-18) DREW with The Jags 124/5 (Barker 21*, Ranjit 17, Nagadev 2-15)

Man of the Match - Bennett

We have drawn before, but this is the first time I can remember in a long long time. This team is a new one on us, I understand they are a Tamil disapora, mainly from mainland India originally. Nice fellas. Queens, we bloody lost the toss again, so as sure as day follows night we were put into field. A slightly makeshift XI saw Paul Cooper make his Jags debut. 

Bennett and Savage got things underway, Bennett was on one this week, as he has been of late. He was aided by getting a wicket early with Ant catching a screamer at slip above his head. Ant and Tyler even made friends briefly as a results of this. 

How an Ant and Bennett friendship might look

Tyler was bowling that scary stuff he does sometimes, so the batsmen tried to go at Savage a bit more than him. Paul Cooper replaced Savage debuting for the Jags took a while to find his line, and then bowled a man off full toss that he somehow re-directed onto his own wickets via an edge I believe. 

This lead to the moment of the night, or indeed any night.

Tyler bowled a full length ball and the batsman nailed a wallop over mid off. Chris Mailes set off to try and field it. The batsmen didn't run, confident of the 4 that was coming, Chris stumbled, then dived and grasped the ball millimeters from the turf at full stretch. The batman was absolutely incredulous, and stood there in disbelief for a full 10 seconds before trudging off. 

The rest of the innings saw Chris demonstrate that he was also in fact human and dropping an absolute dolly a few balls later.  

This week we had regular Morgs back, no doubt encouraged by not having to bowl after Ant, and he mixed up some fantastic lines, with strong economy and a bowled full toss for good measure. Freddie absolutely nailed a direct hit run out - pausing before absolutely murdered the stumps and Savage, having taken a little bit of tap in his early overs, managed to pull it back by switching his line and nailing a death over. I was dinged at the end by the opposition, as a batsman hit it to deep square and it stopped, I picked it up and threw it in and they were adamant that I had crossed the line making it a 4, with two of their guys actually getting down on the ground to look for the spike mark. 

Gents, I did not cross the line, and this is not McEnroe at Wimbledon. Also, to anyone who knows me, can you imagine me even thinking about cheating? There is more chance of Ant becoming an MP.

Ant and I started things off, getting a few first over, before Ant tucked in to the second over like Homer Simpson at an all you can eat buffet. 3 consecutive 4's were plundered and he then turned down a single to leave me on the strike to the other bowler, who had been a bit quicker. 

"All you can eat" is a lie

I then took a gentle single on my way to my highest score of June or July, 9. Woohoo. This left Ant to get himself out, playing one on by fishing wide of off when he could have left well enough alone. 

Chris joined me in the middle for a bit and the rapid early scoring meant we were on for an easy chase. Once again, it got dark quickly. I fell LBW, sad to be out, but glad of spending more time at the crease than it took to walk to and from it. Chris and Freddie got going, Chris hitting some good stuff, and Freddie running well. There was some calamity, pushing back for a tight but gettable second, Chris was run out by a direct hit. Barker did the inevitable and moved the scoring rapidly along. Freddie fell very unfortunately, he absolutely nailed a beauty to cow, but picked probably the only fielder that could have held it.

We looked on for the chase here, comfortable really, Barker in the middle, Ranjit joining him, but it was very very dark at this point. This time of year, winning the toss is key. We then just stopped scoring. Dot dot dot dot dot, single. Dot dot dot dot dot, single, was the passage of play for two overs. We then did a little bit of scoring, a nice shot behind square from Ranjit and Barker doing Barker things, and trying to run singles and 2's when the opportunity presented itself.

We were still well on for the chase at 18 needed from 24, plenty of players to come at 4 down, and then... you know what happened. Lots and lots of dots, and the odd single, to leave us needing 13 from 15, I mean easy right. Well nope.

We got 7 from the next 9 and there was a total of 6 to win from 6 balls. Still totally got this right boys. Loads of batters in the hutch, just don't go for dots. 

Oh dear, dot. 

Oh dear, wicket. Ranjit bowled. 

6 from 4 needed.

5 from 3.

Wide! 4 from 3.

2 runs from 2 balls.

Cooper with the task in the dark. 2 needed off 2, dot... and we pinched a single for a draw mainly as Barker understood the match situation and ran like he does.

A draw and some backchat from the opposition about how my boundary field had cost them the game. It didn't gents, our judicious application of dots, lack of urgency, and the dark skies cost us the game.

Good pub attendance again. We got pizza this week but it was slow. Ah well, more beer time and plenty of opportunity to chat with Mr Paul Yaxley about how utterly wonderful it sounds to be retired.

Chipset Challenge

Qualcomm 164/6 (Hasan 63, Bennet 2-22) beat The Jags 127/6 (Ant 29, Barker 27, Threadgold 20, Hasan 2-22)

Man of the Match - Barker

Our skipper was away this week, and unlike the previous week's weirdness, this was a genuine old school beating. We were complicit in our defeat it must be said.

Qualcomm won the toss (boys, come on, key to each week) and we fielded. Tyler and Liam did their classic opening double act, Liam being unplayable, and Bennett getting the wickets as a result. Scoring was slow to start with, the fielding was good and we looked like we'd keep them to a sensible score. Boud came in and did ok, but got pushed about a bit.

One opener fell (the more mobile of the duo shall we say, as the other one wasn't pinching any singles) trying to up the rate, pushing to square and giving me an easy run out to Phillips behind the stumps.

 Sorry pal, boundaries or bust for me

Tyler caught and bowled one, I think it was absolutely leathered at him, but I may be wrong. Savage bowled a good one top of middle I think, and Boud caught and bowled one. They hadn't scored quickly and we were facing number 2 and number 6 and chirping about being into the tail soon. Savage was captaining and Ant absolutely insisted that he'd been in the nets and his bowling was good.

The over that followed turned this from a well drilled fielding team with good figures into an absolute bloody shower of shite. In fact, I've never seen an over so turn a game on its head. It was 8 of the worst balls ever seen on a cricket field. 8 ball over as well.

Doomsday - A surprisingly good film about a night out in Glasgow. Also a word to describe Ant's over. A perfectly apt word.

Ant's doomsday over singled handedly gave them hope. The larger opener actual started scoring and poor Morgs was left to bowl after Ant at their other man. With a spring in his step he laid into everything on this way to a rapid 63 with Morgs seeing his bowling go mostly into orbit. Bennett gets Liam as support, Morgs gets Ant. That's just not fair. The fielding fell apart and it was all just a bit shit as they coasted to 164. Bennett eventually got the other opener and Dan ran out the slowest man to ever play cricket with a purposeful direct hit run out, but thanks to Ant, the entire team suddenly got the yips.

Mark and Ant opened the batting - and as with the week before as we strolled out the clouds rolled in. Ant scored quickly, I didn't and was then bowled with my feet in cement. George and Ant put on a decent partnership but goodness me it was dark. We might have had a chance with sunlight or 130 odd to chase, but it was the worst of all possible worlds. Ant fell going big, Barker then played a lovely hand, stealing the strike repeatedly to make sure he had fun no matter what. George was bowled. Threadgold came in and with the game so so lost at this point, he and Barker set out having fun, hitting the ball to the sightscreen and beyond and just having fun. 

We fell well short, undone by some batting brilliance, but honestly it was like a voodoo hex happened midway through our fielding innings. And the voodoo was caused by Ant. It wasn't nice voodoo, more the slightly shitting variety from middling horror films.

Some people went to the pub, and again there was no pizza.

Mulched by the Maths

Madingley Mulch (120/5, Manju 24*, Bennett 2-17) beat the Jags (117/6, Parrish 37, Mailes 23, Ruwan 3-13) by 3 runs

Man of the Match - Parrish

I've started a new job which means I haven't had time with the match reports, and this is a few weeks out of synch - so it will be abbreviated and just contain the bits I can piece together from the darker recesses of my 41 year old brain.

The thing that most sticks in the mind about this game is the fact that nothing added up. We were at Queens, looking to get back to high scoring fun and japes. Madingley Mulch won the toss (a theme recently) and wisely decided to bat and put on 120.

Except that they clearly didn't. The batting column in the book says they scored 103. The bowling column in the book says they scored 103. This includes extras. There aren't 120 runs in the book except in the totals column. I'm never going to accuse anyone of cheating without proof, and they seemed like nice fellas, but this just didn't add up, by a massive massive amount. Ah well, we don't want to get promoted anyway.

How to make GCSE maths really hard

I remember Brett and Bennett opening the bowling for us, Brett was doing his classic, too good at bowling to actually get wickets. Weather was nice. Bennett was angry, and the fielding was mostly good. Scoring was very slow to start with, Bennett got one caught by Dan at mid on I think (and he tried to fumble it a lot) and he also bowled one, I think it was top of off with pace, but it is a few weeks ago. Brett plundered on, and honestly I think half of Bennett's wickets are down to Brett. 

Boud, Yaxley and Savage had a bowl. Scoring was still super slow, and Boud had one almost maiden that involved a ripper of a bowled one with one run conceded in the over. Savage kept things interesting and also conceded 2 runs off an over. The scoreboard jumped from 40 to 69 in these two overs. Parrish walked over to the sidelines and politely enquired how 3 runs in 2 overs had pushed the scoring up by 30 odd, and they went to adjust the scoreboard, but only took 9 off. I'm guessing this was when the calculator broke.

Morgs bowled nicely, I recall Boud dropping two catches, and the fielding getting a bit ragged. Barker caught one from Morgs, and Ben Savage threw down the stumps for a nice run out. Parrish did things behind the stumps, they had one partnership, which oddly enough was between two gentleman who are both called Manju. 120/5, not a bad total to face at our home ground, and we'd feel confident with Mailes and Parrish opening the batting.

Scoring was very slow to start with, the bowling that I remember was very good, more spin than I have seen in an evening and the fielding was good. Light drew in quickly, and we were probably well behind the rate initially. Chris was struggling to score and playing some gorgeous pre Bazball Test Match on Day 3 strokes. Matt took his time, but then start punching to the deep and eventually fell bowled for 37 having upped his strike rate to over 120. Threadgold joined Chris, and Chris shortly thereafter perished going to cow for a 4. Fielding was pretty top notch all round at this point.

The wicket keeper had a broken finger. Did I mention that? He still batted and got 20 odd, kept for 10 overs or so and then decided to have a bowl as I walked out. I'm having an absolute fucker of a season on a personal basis, but the ball that he got me with would have cleaned me up at any time in my life on any form. My first golden duck that I can recall (I have plenty of ducks, dear reader, but this is my first genuinely shiny golden one that I can recall). 

Phillips joined Threadgold and did Phillips things - running hard and Dan eventually fell stumped. I'm going to blame Phillips, mainly as I can't remember seeing this one. Phillips and Barker pushed the scoring hard, Phillips was run out, Barker was caught - and Barker had us very very close at the end as he'd kept the scoring rate high, skipping out of his crease. Brett and Boud were left with the last few balls task, which no one envies, and we didn't quite get home. 

Everyone shook hands and they seemed nice bunch, the book made no sense, and we technically lost, but I'm pretty sure we actually won comfortably. Cricket is a funny old game. I'm going to suggest that none of their number try accountancy out as a career. Red Cow was well attended, but we were too late for pizza.

A Selection Committee

Jags (174-1, Parrish 90*!, Dunn 60 Mailes 18*) beat the Dobblers (157/5 S Dobb 44, L Dobb 25, Savage 3-23) by 17 runs. 

 MOTM- Parrish

On an overcast June evening, the Jags continued their league campaign by facing the visit of the Dobblers at Queens. Notable returnees for the match included Steve Mann, Alex Dunn and Chris Mailes. The scorecard available online lists the Jags as only the ten for the match, there was much discussion in the leadup to the match on the strict selection policy for the XI, A Brolia was named in the matchday squad, but alas decided that with only the prospect of a fielding stint available, other matters took priority.

The pitch for tonight’s game looked soft – overnight rain before the game making all involved grateful to get a game on. Something happened at the toss, which I do not recall, the net result saw Matt and Dunny walking out to open the batting for the Jags. The Dobblers XI included several familiar faces, most significantly for tonight’s game was Oscar Fry, teammate at Histon but was opening the bowling tonight.

In the early exchanges, ball dominated bat a couple of edges falling safely, the openers happy to block and leave for the opening passage of play. The outfield was wet from the previously mentioned rain, making 2s and 3s an option for shots that normally were going to the ropes. Having seen the threat of Fry off (0-10(4)) with remarkable patience in a T20, Matt and Alex enjoyed some looser bowling as the changes had to be made. A real feature of the partnership was the running between the wickets, dots were turned to 1’s, 1’s into 2’s etc. Only a couple of times were the batters ever close to jeopardy, the Dobblers not quite able to find the direct hit that could have got a wicket.

The partnership accelerated through the middle overs, Dunny being the first to bring up 50, his second in as many games for the Jags, another wise selection call from Parrish. As the partnership continued to blossom, the other members of the Jags rested ever easier in their seats. A strong crowd had gathered infront of the Queen’s pavilion, Tyler certainly preoccupied with his +1, the Sidemen (look them up, or on second thoughts don’t bother) being the entertainment for the night. 

Back with everyone else’s entertainment this evening, Matt crossed to 50 as well, continuing his fine form in all competitions. The opening partnership continued on it’s merry way, both batters finding the boundary with good regularity, the score 122-0 after 15 (six ball) overs. Looking to accelerate the the innings in the final quarter, an optimistic 2 was called, Dunny unfortunately run out for a cracking 60. Chris in at 3, with just a few overs to cash in at the death.

The two of them were able to score regularly off the change bowlers at the death, Chris finishing the innings with an impressive maximum, and earning himself another red inker at 18*

The man of the moment however and without a doubt the player of the match, Matt walked off the field having batted all 20 overs, finishing on 90*. A great physical effort to be out for all of the Jags 174 runs. A true captain’s innings.

Fully deserving of a break, Matt decided not to take the gloves tonight. This brought a flurry of ideas for replacement keepers, Barker was chosen to take the responsibility. The traditional opening partnership of Liam and Tyler was restored this week, the Jags knew that some early wickets or dot ball pressure would see the rate rise steeply.

Early goings were steady, the dobblers openers playing the balls on it’s merits, the outfield hadn’t quickened up so there was still lots of running between the wickets to be done. Sharp fielding from the Jags’ ten men cut down the runs from the field. The openers picked up the occasional boundary enough to keep the run rate in check.

Savage replaced Brett from the tennis court end and was able to keep the ball in the park, Sawyer being kept busy on the midwicket boundary before being introduced into the attack himself from the far end. Sawyer’s bowling is always a great watch, in the same way as Bazball, every ball is an event! An early stumping chance thanks to Barker’s fast hands was turned away by the ever attentive square leg ump. The run rate was kept in check by the well organised openers, the game still waiting for the first genuine wicket for a bowler in the 30thover. 

Finally, the breakthrough was made, Savage finding the outside edge, well taken by Barker behind the sticks. The batter not happy to be given out, even the non-striker agreeing that the decision was correct. The dobbler’s other opener did not last much longer either, unwisely advancing to Sawyer’s leggies, Barker in the game again, no trouble in giving that stumping.

The middle order had to come out playing their shots because of the steep run rate, Savage collected another thanks to a good running catch from Sawyer in the deep. The jags earning reward for their ‘good lines’ (J Barker 29/6/23). Savage earnt a third from the final ball of his set, dislodging the leg stump. A hat trick ball to come next time.

Mann came into the attack, his economy was hurt from the extras, but otherwise bowled well, the run rate building against the Dobblers. Chris came in and fired up the cele-appeal right away, an LBW shout turning to celebration when the bail was dislodged.

He could have had a second, Sawyer involved in field again, called the catch before spilling it. Thankfully for him, the jags selection policy has already got a head on the block, so we might have him back.

Liam and T were reintroduced to complete their spells and the game two, a great top-order batting performance and a sound effort in the field sees the jags go four for four in the league, keeping the top spot in the table.

Pub turnout might have been good, but I wasn’t there, so cannot comment.

Hardwick and Caldecott next up at Queens – 6th July.