On a balmy Cambridge evening at Fen Ditton, the Jags shook off the post lockdown cobwebs to win comfortably against our old foes and friends, Sharks, with contributions across the board.
Pre-game the chat was about the state of the Ditton pitch, with one set of stumps being at such a funny angle, it looked as though it would fall over in a stiff breeze. There was also a slope that looked as though it turned into a crevasse at one end of the ground, and the track was described pre-game as being "like day 3 at the Somme" by one seasoned observer. Ant is currently car-less, and owing to some questionable career/life choices, he is currently in the process of acquiring a part maroon, part red, Ford Fiesta, which could generously be described as a "runaround". Where's the Merc eh, Ant? Post lockdown beards and bellies were present in abundance varying between hobo (Will) and Bear Grylls (Liam), as a strong team looked forward to salvaging 1 or 2 games of the season before the long, cricket-less, winter.
Parrish wisely chose to bat first this late in the summer, and put Fardell and Langley in to open. Fardell found it difficult against the accurate and rapid bowling of the opener Jeeva, and was struggling to trouble the scorers early on. Langley on the other hand waited only till the second over to bludgeon 3 consecutive 4's on his way to a rapid start for the Jags. In truth both openers tended to treat Jeeva with respect and look to score against other members of the Sharks lineup, as demonstrated by Jeeva's impressive end figures of 12 runs from 3 overs. Respect. Langley continued with fluency, and Fardell did his best to encourage the attendant Jags to support their team, or even just pay attention to what was happening. There was a cheer at one point, more ironic than rousing.
Langley continued with fluency and retired on 28 off 15 balls, demonstrating that a pre-season of nets and training was no substitute for raw natural talent and months of re-watching highlights from the 2019 Cricket World Cup. Parrish's stay at the crease was brief, given out LBW by Liam to a straight low fast one that he missed and was going to hit the middle stump about a foot off the ground. Threadgold game to the crease and struck a few class 4's early on. Fardell and Threadgold both gave the fielders chances, but none were taken in this spell, allowing the Jags to continue scoring at a good clip, getting to 77 for one from 10 overs. Sharks brought Sumit into the attack and he tied the batsmen down for a spell, proving hard to score against and threatening. Fardell fell to him on 24, from 28 balls no less - despite the game being a 20/20 evening game where rapid scoring is important.
Coslett made an appearance at the crease, having rushed back from Southwold on the Suffolk coast slightly late. Threadgold retired on a monster 6 walloped into the trees, making 28 from 20. Brolia then ambled out to the crease, all insouciance and swagger. Coslett presented a caught and bowled back to Sumit after scoring a couple, leaving Cob to stroll in, fresh off a strong leg side sweep showing for Histon at the weekend and sporting a series of fairly impressive bruises. In truth he looks like he's getting weekly beatings from one of his housemates at the moment.
Cob fell early to an absolute class ball from Sumit, with bite and turn, taking the top of off stump. Sumit was the pick of their bowlers on the evening with 3 well made wickets and a couple of dropped catches to his name. Cob's departure brought our guest player for the evening to the crease, Mr Chris Wiseman, who had played for Sharks the previous evening and described himself as a bowler. Ant and Chris put on a strong partnership, with Ant hitting a 6 and taking a shine to the bowling with some lovely strokes, including a nice 4 that he admired in "the pose" for a good 10 seconds. Chris put in some excellent shots, being particularly strong on the off side and committed in his running. We are indebted to the Sharks for providing such a talented substitute.
During this passage of play, I saw something I never thought I would see. Brolia ran 2 2's and even ran a 3 to a ball that actually went for 4. Given that it is hard to get him out of bed at times, this was quite something - I took it as a good omen for the fielding effort ahead. The pace was good and one of the two gentlemen retired, bringing Brett to the crease. He struck a couple of deft shots before being trapped in front LBW. As chance would have it, Mr Parrish was the umpire at this point, and I swear he'd given Brett out LB before the ball had even pitched.
Mann ("I got 87 once") went out to join proceedings and struck a sweet late cut, or super dab as I'm going to call it. He was briefly joined by Will.I.Am, and managed to contribute a 4 owing to some comedy fielding, driving the Jags to a very competitive 155-5. In truth the track was actually pretty true for most of the evening, and pre-game concerns about the strip were not generally justified this evening.
Strolling out to field, the team were full of chatter, always a thoroughly good sign. Will opened the bowling and produced a ball worthy of Histon 3's first up, full length, pace, and the late movement of an in-ducker to send the opening batsman, Jeeva, back to the hutch without troubling the scorers. He's a danger man, so this was quite something. The fielding was energetic and lively and after his first ball, Will introduced some of the famed Longstanton variety to his bowling for the rest of the first over. Liam opened the other end despite being seriously injured, and being marked down as "balding-beard" in the Sharks scorebook. I assume he read this description before strolling out, as he was fired up and bowled very well, taking a wicket caught in his first over. Coslett was the catcher, and he tried to make an easy catch look as physically difficult as possible, but still managed to hold on.
Threadgold, Langley, Parrish and Ant, yes Ant, all provided notable hard working shifts in the field. It was a delight to see, as the clouds rolled in and the darkness began to descend. Brett got a second wicket very well bowled, and was that thing that he can occasionally be, threatening and economical - the perfect 20/20 bowler. Will continued, a little wayward, but in truth he had done so much damage with the first ball that he'd set the Jags up to constrict the Sharks early on.
Then, disaster - Cob had been tidy behind the stumps, but in the descending light he failed to pick one that went through the batsman from Liam, dived and deflected the ball straight into his eye. It looked nasty. Someone enquired as to whether he was ok, and he said in true Geordie style, "yep, fine lads". When we gathered round the pooling blood suggested otherwise. The batsmen at this point had generously jogged a single to allow the batsman at the non-striker's end, an actual doctor no less (Dr Raj), to get closer to the wounded wicketkeeping warrior. The game paused and the doctor decided to retire to tend to his new patient, with Parrish taking wicket keeping duties and Jags a man light.
Brolia came in to bowl and started by bowling one that strained his side. He also got his customary wide in first over - nice to get it out of the way early, chap. His bowling was otherwise very tidy. At this point the good doctor had finished his inspection, and determined that the best thing was for Cob to go to A&E, sporting a nasty looking cut eyebrow. Mani, the umpire at this stage kindly volunteered to take him, and the game continued. Threadgold, sporting a new reverse Pietersen style skunk hairdo, came in to bowl at the other end. The Sharks batsmen tried to accelerate at this point, so scoring rates moved upwards, but chances were coming.
Ant then bowled one that went through the batsman, and Parrish quick as a flash threw down the stumps, finding the batsman out of his ground, for a smartly taken stumping suggesting a man who did the job week in week out.
As Threadgold and Ant continued, Sharks pushed on. The doctor came back to re-join proceedings when Threadgold secured a wicket, very well caught by Langley in the deep. In truth, the good Doctor was the class act of this half of the innings, helping a fellow wounded player and hitting some lovely shots on his way to top scoring for the Sharks at 25* across two spells. Threadgold bowled the normal Sharks skipper with a full ball, bringing Sumit and Marc to the crease. Wiseman then demonstrated his bowling prowess with 3 economic overs. The scorebook is a little messy on the details, but we will say 3 overs that conceded 12 runs. Langley produced some fine work in the field that I recall, and chirp and chatter was excellent - even if the light wasn't.
Chris was joined by the irrepressible Steve Mann - the only gentleman I know who had legal access to a pub during lockdown. Sumit scored some classy shots trying to get Sharks within sight, but the rate was climbing and it looked a lost cause. Marc pleaded with Fardell to come on and twirl his arm for an over or two, but the experienced Parrish knew better than to risk calamity, and stuck with Chris and Steve. I'm going to take this opportunity to describe Steve Mann's bowling action as languid and erotic, because I can.
In the end, Sharks were never close to chasing it down despite some good efforts from the batsmen - and the Jags fielding and most of the bowling was exemplary.
On leaving the field talk was of the Plough in Fen Ditton, assuming we could find it in the enveloping gloom. I found the below tissue next to my cricket bag, a testament to the heroism and manliness of Cob the helmet dodger.
We received the welcome update that Cob was having his eye glued back together and would be down at the pub soon. Ant took the opportunity to drive Cob's car out of the ground. If Cob had known we would toss his car keys to Ant, it is distinctly likely he would have driven himself to the hospital. The pub was pleasant, with a good turnout and cheer. Cob made good on his promise to attend, fully re-assembled and ready for a pint of the bitter stuff.
We're all most pleased that he looks no less attractive than he did before and are very grateful to Dr Raj and Mani for their assistance.
A good game played in good spirits, with contributions from across the board. It suggests this would have been a wonderful season, but in truth, we are just happy to get a game in after the madness of 2020.
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